Sweet Nothings and No-Ones

Episode 19; A Sassy Widdle Weech

This week's episode our Sweet No-ones tell the tales of how they began their careers as multi-hyphenates! Jake delves into his first time picking up a camera and how it went from there, whilst Jared discusses the good, the bad and the poison from their experience writing and creating beautiful theatrical productions.  

 

They delve into the gender identities of cartoons, the sartorial splendour of religious figures, and the eternal question; What ever happened to Dog Poo? Jake's gossip story this week is "The story of the singing tenants" which he will try to navigate through as many sound effects bleeping names and details as possible.

 

Jared discusses all things comedy, acting and how at one point in time, they were the face of Doritos, Panadol, Apple, Google, KFC, Samsung, Dimetapp, Optus, Pizza Hut and more. Jake talks about the not so pretty side to the beautiful photos we see - a part of the industry that isn't always talked about.

 

And we'll leave you with an important question, if on a date with Jared, which random fixation is least creepy; Living dolls, you favourite serial killers or Cat Meringue.

 

Remember to follow our pod on Instagram @Sweetnothingspod

Episode 18; You were a twink when I met you

Happy SNANday to you all! To celebrate a year since we decided to make a podcast, we're bringing you an episode all about our childhood Fads! 

We're Tweeting, Threading & BeRealing all of our most favourite childhood things; Pokemon cards, Tazos & pods, beanie babies, Russ toys, Jellycat Amuseables, Jelly-Bellys, knuckleheads, inflatable furniture, furbies, yo-yos, hula hoop, tamagotchis, handball, Chatter Rings, and more!

If we can get Jake off his phone for long enough, and Jared can clear the Throg in their throat, Jared will tell us all about their current depressive spiral and their favourite podcast in this week's Jarried Away.

Be prepared for these No-ones spending the next hour discussing all the most magical tools and toys of their childhood! And even though Jared's dad doesn't like it, we're pumping Madison Avenue, Rogue Traders, Boomkat, Pauline Pantsdown, Robyn, Robin S. and more!

Tangent's include; Jared's current catsitting escat-pades, Christopher Columbus movies, Cards against Disney, Jake's mum's current Chanel bag situation and overeating ice cream!

SNANgent 9

Come get gacked as we take you into a wild world where Queer History & Mardi Gras shares the same plane of existence as Philomena Cunk, Horny Spiderman and Madame Web.

 

Our SNANgent's are the little moments and tangents lost to the cutting room floor, picked up and glued together in a fun but random way to give you a little more 'HAHAHA' during your week!

 

Enjoy and remember to follow the pod on Instagram @Sweetnothingspod

Episode 17; I speak without a mouth

We're in a post Mardi Gras haze and our introduction will certainly prove that our Sweet No-ones need more sleep, more water and less crazies!

Sound issues, mic noises and squeaky elbows aside, we're trying to get back on track and this week's episode is all about RIDDLES!

 

One of these days we'll have a theme song for Jake's gossip story - but for now, listen to his insane stories of a two sets of crazy neighbours; the "ding dong witches" and the chocolate gays!

 

Penis, Poo, Ooblek and the Ning Nang Nong Song later, our No-ones get into sharing their most favourite riddles to trick each other and sadly Jared reveals their very boomer idea of gays.

Make sure to be following us on Instagram @Sweetnothingspod and we'll see you soon wish a special Mardi Gras edition SNANgent! 

SNANgent 8

Time for our first SNANgent of the year! On today's SNANgent;  Kate Middle-Tonne-Of-Gossip!

Jake spills the “English Breakfast” on Kate Middleton’s disappearance, whilst trying to help Jared detangle the im/famous British family's lineage and come away with even a modicum of what in the royal hell is going on.

We hope she got out Scott Free ;)

Episode 16; A Whisper of Vegemite

This episode is a little less focused than usual, so for that, we apologise. Our hosts are in a mood and it means they deviate from the theme into angry curmudgeons very easily! Nevertheless, we shall digress... 

Our theme this week is all about Roomates and Housemates!

Jared's first official segment is introduced and it's all about their favourite genre! Jake share's a story about one of the world's worst housemates including a room full of dead orchids, a collection of engagement rings, and a random naked couple showing up in his bed! Then Jared tell's us all about living at home with their family - something that we can probably all relate to at some point. 

Surrounding the stories is a messy mix of angry rants on recent films and celebrity takeovers, debates about syrups and pillows and well you'l have to listen for yourself! 

Enjoy and make sure to follow us on Instagram @sweetnothingspod!

Episode 15; Somebody that I used to Blow

We're back, SNAN is back from our holidays!

Our wonderful little no-ones discuss their holiday break and being the cinefiles they are, they discuss all the movies they watched over the holidays - what were your favourites? Jake and Jared also introduce the very first of our brand new segments that will become frequent throughout the episodes.

 

Our first theme for 2024 is Ins and Outs - and we're not here for your bureaucratic nonsense that it's too late to be discussing this. It's 2024, we can do what we want! Self sabotage, unsolicited butter, Advanced Style, and quiet quitting are just some of the ideas discussed this week.

 

We're removing toxicity and celebrating the romance of friendship! We're making 2024 the year that we celebrate ourselves and those who love and support us! Speaking of supporting us - Tell everyone about SNAN! We want our podcast to get out there and that will only happen if you tell everyone you know about how much you love us! 

 

So whether you're throwing coal in the fire, trimming the fat or dinging all the things, remember to touch grass, and S'live! SNAN IS BACK!

Remember to follow us on Instagram @Sweetnothingspod!

 

Episode 14; Late for an Early Bloomer

It's the silly season and our hosts have gone full Marge Simpson (and a little Delulu)! This week's episode is all about how our hosts lost their virginity.

As we bypass the Oratrice mécanique d'analyse cardinale, we decipher the difference between literally and figuratively and those who constantly use the wrong term - Literally don't be one of those people or we'll figuratively destroy you!

Jared sets the scene for a story of them snowboarding off the chairlift, into the woods and right into the closet for some kissing. Picture it; A snow-covered lodge, woodfire burning, playing chess on Louis chairs... the setting of an Agatha Christie crime novel - or Jared's childhood trauma - you be the judge!

Jake shares the story of his first time and that unexpected feeling of numbness - literally AND figuratively! You'll never guess why!

So whether there's a pickle in your fridge or a flerkin above that gherkin; it's the final episode of 2023 and we're closing our first season with an absolute fruit smoothie in the shower! 
We hope you've enjoyed the first season of SNAN. All the tales, the trials, the tribulations... and the diabolical profanities we've all shared! 

We'll be back in 2024 with season 2; Electric Boogaloo! But for now, If you've got questions, we'll bring you SNANswers in only a month's time! 

Remember to follow for all updates on Instagram @Sweetnothingspod

"After you've polished off a bottle of champagne and you've had a threesome and you've sat on the balcony having a cigarette looking out over the city - that KFC goes down like a delicious treat y'all" The truest words from one Jared Jekyll.

SNANgent 7

Time for another SNANgent! An unscheduled and utterly unabashed collage of cuttings from episodes past that didn't make it, but we've been storing in our secret laboratory underneath central station awaiting this exact moment to let it all out! 

This episode's collage includes; SpongeBob Square Impressions, haemorrhoids, Disney villains, Twitter Formally known as X, Wiley VS Roadrunner, Martin McDonagh, Jada & Will.

Indulge, devour, enjoy and we'll be seeing you soon for our FINAL EP OF THE YEAR (& Season1)!

Love you SNANagrams! 

Episode 13; Sartorial Splendour Funeral Yacht Wear

This week's episode is all about Fashion! Our hosts discuss the difference between fashion and style, sartorial trends, gender expression and revisiting their own fashion journeys. 

We explore Jake's infamous obsession with vests, cargo pants and thongs (sandals for all you Americans). We all had to live through that tragic era of distaste, and now you do too! We examine Jared's secret goth to emo to scene kid evolution including their "quick lad phase".

We go through homage design, satire and parody in designer brands, rip-offs and ripped jeans and celebrate the resounding importance of Australian design iconoclast Mambo. Our host's discuss the importance and narrative behind individual pieces; A watch, a t-shirt, a hat, a shoe... we all have that apparel that means so much to us and why!

Fashion is identity, it's a conversation starter, it's art, it's design, it's a statement, it's story and narrative. We try to dress for who we are. Once we discover who we are, we want to tell people what to expect from us before we even open our mouths. Fashion is a uniform, its modern-day armour, it's how we express our identity and protect us throughout the day.

So whether you're a Tsubi girl or a Ksubi girl, don't forget to take Selfie with your Guncle on the next Staycation and never, EVER wear Uggs boots in front of Jake!*

*Except when at home in winter. 

To all our Locksmiths, Blacksmiths and Wordsmiths, you better be following the pod on Instagram @Sweetnothingspod and our hosts @jakeling and @jaredjekyll.